ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Treat yourself, they said.
You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every one.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- Limited-time event. Will not return. Neither will your Saturday.
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Remember when you stayed up late on purpose? Now you're up at 3am because…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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