ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You typed "speak to an agent" nine times.
The bot sent you a help article about speaking to agents. The agents were let go in March.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.…
- The first email you open on Monday is a reply-all from Friday. Forty replies.…
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- Youth is wasted on the young. You wasted yours too. Old age is next,…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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