ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You are a valued member of the team.
So was the last person in your chair. Nobody knows where she went.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Till death do us part. Not a vow. A fixed-term contract with an unspecified…
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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