ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 22 OCTOBER 1979
Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress".
It said the same when you opened it by accident. It'll keep saying it after you've gone, if nobody cancels the subscription.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- Every relationship has a honeymoon period. Yours was the walk from the bar to…
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- Not all who wander are lost. You are. The map gave up.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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