ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Remember when you stayed up late on purpose?
Now you're up at 3am because your knee filed a complaint.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- You don't have a type. You have a pattern. Your friends have a group…
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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