ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 6 JANUARY 1983
Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday".
Except a manager, and he meant your Monday, not his.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- Your partner says they'd be lost without you. They'd be lost for about eighteen…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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