ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Beach body ready?
The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't waiting for you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- The best time to start saving was twenty years ago. The second-best time was…
- You can do anything you set your mind to. Your mind has set itself…
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- Parenting is ten percent love and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is.…
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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