ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 20 DECEMBER 1987
Start the week strong.
Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a buffering icon.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- Wealth is built slowly. Debt is built quickly. And it's hereditary.
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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