ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 10 SEPTEMBER 1988
You wanted a mini-me.
You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost to you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You sent "lol" to avoid having feelings. It worked. You feel nothing, said nothing,…
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- The hardest part of working out is getting started. You've made sure it stays…
- Wildflowering means letting the relationship grow naturally, with no timeline. It has the growth…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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