ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question".
Zack has read your ideas. Zack would like them escorted from the building.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- Your complaint has been escalated. It is now ignored by someone more senior.
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
- You put "open to work" on LinkedIn. Six recruiters viewed your profile. Five were…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
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