ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month.
The call took 94 minutes. You break even in 2031. They put it back up in 2027.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The form needs a form. The second form is not currently available.
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- Your back now goes out when you sneeze. It goes out more than you…
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. Your overdraft found it first.…
- Inside every older person is a younger person. The younger person is furious about…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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