ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Beach body ready?
The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't waiting for you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- Your startup is a chatbot that tells customers they're right. Investors loved it. The…
- The first email you open on Monday is a reply-all from Friday. Forty replies.…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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