ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“I'm here for the right reasons.”
The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a fake tan.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway. Written down…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- You can do anything you set your mind to. Your mind has set itself…
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- “Too close to call” means nobody knows. It is said by people paid a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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