ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands.
It will be the most productive minute of the quarter.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The best time to start saving was twenty years ago. The second-best time was…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- Unlimited holiday is a lovely policy. The company did the maths on your guilt,…
- Running clears your head. Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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