ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 10 SEPTEMBER 2000
You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care.
It's been delivered. It's been read. It is now the most caring thing anyone has ever ignored.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Work smarter, not harder. You've chosen neither, and HR has a folder.
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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