ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You bought the yoga mat.
The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible, more mindful and better liked.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- Your bio says "foodie, traveller, dreamer". You've been abroad once, and you still talk…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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