ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your call is important to us.
Not important enough to answer, but important.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Every relationship has a honeymoon period. Yours was the walk from the bar to…
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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