ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 28 JANUARY 2005
Your thirties are your twenties with consequences.
The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports straight to your liver.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every great company started in a garage. Yours will end there too. The car's…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- You can do anything you set your mind to. Your mind has set itself…
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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