ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 8 OCTOBER 2005
Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner.
You'll eat standing up for eighteen years. Then sit down and forget how.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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