ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Age is just a number.
So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than your salary.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
- You "work best under pressure". You don't. You just only work under pressure.
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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