ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Being single means nobody steals your duvet.
It also means the duvet is the only witness to your life.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- Not all who wander are lost. You are. The map gave up.
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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