ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You have an eleven-step skincare routine.
Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is doing its best. It isn't a miracle worker.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- Underconsumption core is a beautiful aesthetic. It's what the last week of the month…
- Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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