ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You got a houseplant to "take care of something".
It died. Even the plant had better boundaries than you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something. It landed.…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
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