ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Every birthday is a gift.
The gift is one fewer birthday.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- You left them on read "to be mysterious". They didn't notice. They were also…
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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