ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 19 SEPTEMBER 2014
Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending in y, right up until the all-hands where they mention you in the past tense.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad. The…
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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