ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The return to office is completely optional.
So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet there you are, ranked 41st. They're "reviewing" 41st.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending…
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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