ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You wanted a mini-me.
You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost to you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- Clear-coding means stating your intentions up front. Hers was "I have a hard stop…
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
- Early access means you paid to watch someone not finish something. You do that…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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