ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "in your villain era".
You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times. Villains have done less damage at a christening.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your bio says "foodie, traveller, dreamer". You've been abroad once, and you still talk…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. Your overdraft found it first.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
No spam. Just disappointment. Unsubscribe whenever you regain hope.