ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your step counter used to set goals.
Now it just sends "Hello?" like a relative checking you're still alive.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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