ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing.
When you leave, someone will fight over the plant.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment. The candles are outnumbering the years…
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- “Too close to call” means nobody knows. It is said by people paid a…
- “Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English…
- Your inbox reached zero once. The server was down. You were briefly free and…
- You've got a side hustle, a passion project and a podcast. Combined monthly income:…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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