ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 28 DECEMBER 2018
No pain, no gain.
You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your file.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Your soft launch was a hand in a photo. The hard launch never came.…
- Scale your business. Currently it's you, a laptop, and your mum, who bought one…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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