ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 16 SEPTEMBER 2020
Your resting heart rate is excellent.
It's had nothing else to do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Think outside the box. The box had the budget. You're out here with a…
- You can do anything you set your mind to. Your mind has set itself…
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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