ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel.
You'll still lose.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your therapist said set boundaries. You set one. Then texted them at 2 a.m.…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Inside every older person is a younger person. The younger person is furious about…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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