ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake.
The standing still was flawless. The getting up took a team, a run-up and a noise you'd never made before.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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