ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending in y, right up until the all-hands where they mention you in the past tense.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- You don't have a type. You have a pattern. Your friends have a group…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- Unlimited holiday is a lovely policy. The company did the maths on your guilt,…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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