ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You've been "about to start the gym" since January.
It's October. The gym has had two owners and a refurb in the time you've been about to.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- Youth is wasted on the young. You wasted yours too. Old age is next,…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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