ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 25 DECEMBER 2023
Kids grow up so fast.
Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and you age a decade.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- Life is short. A measurable chunk of it will be spent in the post…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
- Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. Your overdraft found it first.…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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