ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You got the ick because they ran for a bus.
You've been single three years and you run for nothing. Including opportunities.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- Some meetings could have been an email. You'll spend four years of your one…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 444
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