ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 28 APRIL 1956
Your inbox reached zero once.
The server was down. You were briefly free and didn't notice.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You "grew out of" your old friends. They grew out of waiting for you…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- The house will be tidy again one day. The day they move out. Tidy,…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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