ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress".
It said the same when you opened it by accident. It'll keep saying it after you've gone, if nobody cancels the subscription.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
- Some meetings could have been an email. You'll spend four years of your one…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- The first email you open on Monday is a reply-all from Friday. Forty replies.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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