ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again."
That's also the plan for your job next quarter.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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