ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 3 MAY 1961
Your alarm didn't wake you.
The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
- Remember when you stayed up late on purpose? Now you're up at 3am because…
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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