ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your resting heart rate is excellent.
It's had nothing else to do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
- You're not broke. You're pre-rich. The "pre" is permanent.
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Make your money work for you. Yours quit in 2019. It works for your…
- Every relationship has a honeymoon period. Yours was the walk from the bar to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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