ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“Too close to call” means nobody knows.
It is said by people paid a lot to know.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You "grew out of" your old friends. They grew out of waiting for you…
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Your startup is an app that replaces a phone call. With a waitlist, a…
- Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year. Nobody noticed…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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