ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Treat yourself, they said.
You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every one.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- When you're gone, the one who misses you most will be the algorithm. It…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Every great company started in a garage. Yours will end there too. The car's…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something. It landed.…
- The sun will eventually swallow the Earth. Until then, the bins still go out…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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