ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Romance isn't dead.
It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from 2022.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- Early access means you paid to watch someone not finish something. You do that…
- Your job title will outlive you. It's already been posted on LinkedIn, with a…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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