ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress".
It said the same when you opened it by accident. It'll keep saying it after you've gone, if nobody cancels the subscription.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- You sent "lol" to avoid having feelings. It worked. You feel nothing, said nothing,…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- The game asks if you want to continue. Nobody ever asks if you want…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- The documentary is unfiltered. It took seven people to remove the filter.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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