ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 13 SEPTEMBER 1963
Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress".
It said the same when you opened it by accident. It'll keep saying it after you've gone, if nobody cancels the subscription.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Some meetings could have been an email. You'll spend four years of your one…
- Scale your business. Currently it's you, a laptop, and your mum, who bought one…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- Parenting is ten percent love and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is.…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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