ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Start the week strong.
Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a buffering icon.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Monday has its own support group. The group is everyone. The meetings are also…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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