ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up.
Eleven kilometres later you'd caught three pigeons, a cold and a physio waiting list that will outlive the app.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- Remember when you stayed up late on purpose? Now you're up at 3am because…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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